Alright boys week fucking 12. The clock is ticking for most of you dumpster fire squads.. 2 more weeks to drag your sorry ass teams to the playoffs. For majority of the league id like to thank you for your donations in advance, without you guys this league would never have made it to where it is today. Lets get into it.
In this absolute game of the year matchup, both teams see a name change. A little confused here, but Ringless Robby has got quite the ring to it. Ha thats about the only thing associated with robby that has a ring. Tbh i can’t blame these owners for changing their names.. i wouldn’t want to be associated with those 1st 11 weeks either. But anyways lets get back to the field.. after breaking down the game film I can’t see anyway in which this one isn’t an absolute rout. For those of you less fortunate, a rout is defined as “a disorderly retreat of defeated troops.” Look for the gay boys to be running away from this one with their tail between their legs, staying up all night listening to drake. “The worst part about being strong is that no one ever ask if you’re okay.” Ringless Robby by a thousand.
2. Julio’s Waffle House (5-6) vs AB’s Wild Ride (4-7)
*SPOILER ALERT* These 2 spiraling teams meet in this 1:00 flexed game. Earlier in the season this game was supposed to be MNF but the league realized it didn’t want to waste the viewers time. This game is a foreshadow of bills vs jets week 17 this year. We have the fraudulent Waffle house who snuck out some early wins and put themselves in playoff contention vs the horrible jets who have nothing but pride to play for. Expect the Wild Ride to put the waffle house in the Gravitron this week.. those walls are going to be sticky.
3. The Clawwww (8-3) vs SuttOn My face (5-6)
Alright boys, you know when you get to the part on sunday after you lose all your parlays, the jets and giants have ripped out your heart, you’ve stared at your fantasy team put up 56 points, all the 1:00 games are over and you rip your nicotine devices until you pass out on the couch? This is that time. Absolute snoozefest as the clawwww just keeps on snatching souls.
4. Sammy gave me a Chubb (6-5) vs Let me hit your Jujul (5-6)
Man this is the fucking reason i love this beautiful sport that we play. The fucking simoney show down week 12, playoffs on the line. If this doesn’t tickle your balls idk what will. All i know is somebody will be passing the stuffing at thanksgiving this week. I know in my line of work you guys expect picks and you expect winners but this is a battle of two winners. This one is going to come down to whoever has the ball last and boy do you not want to miss it. Sorry to say it but I’m going to have to rock with the chubbs here.
5. Hepatitis D (4-7) vs Baby Shaker Baker (8-3)
Hold the phone here folks.. looks like the Hepatitis D is evolving and those damn antibiotics aren’t working anymore. This red hot team is coming off 2 huge wins after a monster trade that left some fans and owners murmuring. Clearly hepatitis D knew Tua was a weak ass bitch because this team is no longer tanking. I really don’t wanna say it but I’m gunna say it.. a win this week and Hepatitis D is eyeing a playoff spot. (eyeball emoji) Expect the baby shakers to coast into this game as they are one of 2 teams to already clinch. Expect the baby shakers to start scaling back their starters minutes to gear up for the playoffs. Gunna try something new here and pull out my mushing powers on the baby shakers..throw the house on the shakers this week.
6. Mud Monkeys (5-6) vs Officer Dickskin (5-6)
The officer absolutely burned me last week. They were my mortal lock, the sherif was back in town, blue lives almost mattered. Part of me is done with this organization and part of me also wants to slam my hand right back on stove and see if i get burned again. Tbh before writing this there was really no way i could see the officer pulling this one off but i now i got myself fired up. Im touching the flame.. OFFICER DICKSKIN resurrection game.